Showing concern
Sometimes other people are sad, upset or have a problem of some kind.
There are many things we can say to show concern. Here are ten of them.
Ten ways to ask if someone is OK
casual · neutral · formal
- What's the matter?neutralYou look upset. What's the matter?
- Are you alright?neutralYou fell off the bike! Are you alright?
- What's getting you down?casualYou've been quiet all week. What's getting you down?
- What's up (with you)?casualWhat's up with you today?
- Why the long face?casualWhy the long face? Did you fail the test?
- You look a bit down.neutralYou look a bit down. Do you want to talk?
- Is there anything I can do to help?neutralYour father is in hospital? Is there anything I can do to help?
- Do you need a shoulder to cry on?casualBad day? Do you need a shoulder to cry on?
- You look like you could do with a drink.casualLong day at work? You look like you could do with a cup of tea.
- Oh you poor thing!casualYou lost your wallet? Oh you poor thing!
How to use them
- , and 5 are asking the other person what their problem is.
- , and 3 are more sympathetic while are less friendly.
- is a simple observation that the other person looks sad. But you expect the other person to explain the problem.
- are offering help or sympathy.
- is specifically offering to listen while the other person talks about their problem or reason for sadness.
- is an offer of a drink (alcohol or a cup of tea). This is a typical British response to somebody with a major problem or after a disaster of some kind.
- is intended to sound sympathetic. This expression can sound patronizing to some people.
Quick check
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"Why the long face?" asks:
"A shoulder to cry on" is:
Which phrase offers practical help?
See also: "I am worried about..." · Cheering someone up
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